August 17, 2010

Deb:

Thank you for signing the transfer papers.

I would never even attempt to keep you from seeing Linda or Linda from seeing you under any circumstances. You completely misunderstand me. You, Jason, Jason's friends, Vince, Dotty and everyone else have always been welcomed into our home whenever you dropped by or when Linda and I invited you. When you came here to eat a meal with us we always accommodated your special dietary needs without exception. The fact that you and Vince sometimes chose to meet Linda outside our house without inviting me never troubled me, nor did I ever try to keep her from going on those outings. While I will admit I'm not a fan of Aurelio's gluten free pizza, they also make the regular kind and I would never let food choices come between family.

I will let the others who have read the e-mails I have been sending judge whether I have ever been uncivil towards you, and I have already forgiven you for anything anyone might feel you have done uncivil towards me. I acknowledge that some of the folks at I U Hospital have provided excellent care to Linda, especially the women in physical therapy, the men and women in respiratory therapy, and most of the men and women who attended her as nurses. I U Hospital's own records amply reflect, however, at least six separate occasions upon which doctors or nurses there seriously hurt her in ways that caused her pain and suffering, and significantly extended her hospitalization. Even Dr. Tector has acknowledged to me verbally on several occasions that the horrible things they did to Linda there "should not have happened." I guess that's all the acceptance of responsibility doctors are ever willing to give until recompense is extracted by the verdict of a jury.

The doctors and nurses who say I interfered with Linda's care are only reflecting their hurt feelings that I sometimes asked questions about their treatment plans they couldn't answer - like why a doctor caring for her when she was in a coma would treat her for two weeks on the assumption her system was overloaded with narcotics without even running a $20 blood or urine test for opiate residue. Which, by the way, when he did write the order after two weeks, on my insistence, came back completely negative. If that test had been done on the first day after they overdosed her, of course, it would have objectively demonstrated that she was given a double dose of IV Dilaudid - why else would they wait two weeks to test her urine? I never intended anything except that the doctors fully explain why they proposed the treatments they were recommending, before consenting to them on Linda's behalf when she was unconscious. It was and is my solemn obligation to Linda to do so, despite the constant assertions that I was interfering with her treatment, and the suggestions, verbal and by their actions, that I should just shut up and get out of their way. The fact they had me hauled off to jail on phony, trumped up charges despite the city police officer's wish to just take me outside the hospital and release me, shows that "shut up and get out of our way" was always exactly what Linda's doctors had in mind for me. Dr. Fridell even told me my uncharacteristically probing questions made him feel like he was being cut by an Xacto knife.

If my behavior contributed in any way to Linda's sadness, it was because I was carrying out the solemn legal, moral and ethical obligations she imposed on me last September, which I always did in her presence, sight and hearing - to the extent she was conscious - and which she never one time told or asked me to stop. Most of the time when things got contentious between me and her doctors in her room, she smiled to see and hear my advocacy for her and on her behalf. I will never stop fighting for Linda, no matter who else I might piss off in the process.  

You yourself have told me many times that as a nurse at a State of Illinois facility you often feel you are "choking on stupid" regarding the ways patients there are treated or mistreated. I choose not to choke on stupid, rather to spit it back and challenge it at every turn, especially when it nearly kills someone I love. I will never apologize to anyone that I went to jail rather than roll over and play dead at the foot of the mountain of stupid Indiana University Hospital heaped upon Linda time after time, to her great, painful and permanent injury.

For the rest of August I'm going to fully concentrate on keeping Linda's health insurance in force, getting her moved back to Illinois, and seeing her comfortably situated in a setting where she will be well cared for. I'm going to do everything in my power to keep Indiana lawyers out of the events if that is possible. If Linda is not back in the Chicago area by September 1, 2010, that will likely change. Please let's work together on this, with the help of Richard and Chuck to watch over Linda where I cannot go.