October 4, 2010

Deb:

You can hate me as much as you want, you can try as hard as you like to shut me out of Linda's life, and you can let your anger at me get the best of you, but will never get me to stop loving her or trying to get her out of the terrible place you have left her alone in with no one to defend her against the awful doctors who keep hurting her. The fact you feel justified in abandoning her there for days at a time when it is NOT my fault they threw me out of there is completely illogical. They had already decided not to let me back in when they sent me away. My coming back to say goodbye to her and let her know I had not abandoned her had nothing to do with the outcome. The hospital had already decided to throw me out because I tried to expose their incompetence to the press.

They are the bad guys not me. And now you have chosen to be on their side and try to freeze me out of Linda's life. If they kill her it will be your fault for abandoning her to their whims and dismal treatment. They could have done a pleurodesis but waited so long to even think about it that now they say she is too sick to tolerate the procedure. And you let them get away with such awful medical care that you know is bad, when you are a trained nurse. Worse than that, you assist them in depriving Linda of the watchful eye of the only person in the world who ever cared enough about her and how she was being treated to spend 24 hours a day seven days a week in the room with her. You helped them justify throwing me out by making yourself available as a power of attorney when you knew you could not live up to the fiduciary obligations imposed by that position because you won't stay there with her to speak for when she can't speak, and you are just too afraid of her doctors to stand up to them and tell then NO when that is what Linda wants and what needs to be done.

You have screwed things up so badly your sister will probably not survive to ever leave that place, and you are going to let her die there without me or anyone else in the room to comfort her at the end because you won't stand up to their bullying and insist that they let me back in. Don't give me the load of crap Chuck has been trying to feed me about how well Linda is progressing. As long as she can't breathe on her own Tector will never let her go because he is on the Blue Cross gravy train and all he cares about is the money. Everyone at I U Hospital including the risk management people, the care managers and the lawyer is afraid to go against what Tector says because he is the billion dollar a year cash cow for that hospital. You know all of this is true, yet you continue to take their side against me. So be it.

You have earned my hatred, and you have it. You choose not to respond to my reasonable requests for information about how Linda is doing, because you are afraid of the hospital and what they have threatened you with, though they have no legal basis whatsoever for making such threats. You are useless to me and to Linda and once she recovers, if they don't kill her, she will realize that. Try with all your might to turn Linda against me and you may succeed, but it will not be good for her. Hate me all you like, you are in no position to care for her for the rest of her life with me out of the picture, but that's what you will have to do if you succeed in turning her against me as you are very clearly trying to do by cooperating with the hospital in its attempt to cut me off from all communication with her and about her.

I don't care what you may think of me. I don't care what anyone but Linda thinks of me. If I hear from her lips that she wants me out of her life, I will go. Otherwise, I will continue fighting for what I know is right whether it means you never get to see her again, Chuck never gets to see her again, or whatever other terrible consequences they threaten you with. Consequences are coming for those awful people, and soon. I have already initiated a criminal investigation into their interference with my get well cards mailed to Linda, which is a federal crime. If you are part of it and end up in jail because of that, tough.

I have initiated lawyer discipline proceedings against Michele Calderon Johns because she knows there are no guardianship court orders, no domestic violence court orders, and no criminal no contact court orders, and yet she continues to permit hospital supervisors to lie to nurses, other caregivers and visitors about the existence of such orders. I am right now in the process of studying about how to proceed with a disciplinary complaint against Dr. Tector's medical license for his failures in Linda's care and treatment, and his complicity in illegally interfering with my right to communicate with my wife. I will not rest until he is no longer permitted to practice medicine. I will go after all the other doctors who have hurt Linda as well.

I have already complained to the Joint Commission about I U Hospital's abuses in Linda's case and against me, and I will continue to add to that case as additional information comes to my attention, and sooner or later it will all come to my attention, whether you tell me about it or not. Lawsuits are the least of their worries now. I will not rest until I U Hospital loses its accreditation.

You will end up being a witness in many of these proceedings because you will be subpoenaed to testify. You will be a defendant in the court case regarding the validity of my health care power of attorney for Linda, especially if you continue refusing to provide me a copy of the "new" power the hospital keeps telling people Linda has signed excluding me. After all the other lies those people have told me and others about mythical court proceedings and orders of protection, I have no reason whatsoever to believe such a document exists until I see it with my own eyes. Besides, I know Linda signed it under duress, if she signed any such paper at all. The least you could do is fax a copy to me, if it is real, so we can peacefully go to court to determine it's validity. The truth will come out eventually, and you told Chuck at first there was no such document, so you lied about it to someone at some point in time.

If you think I am going to let any of this go without litigation, criminal investigation where warranted, and professional licensing discipline, you are dreaming. I will not stop until everyone who has participated in keeping me separate from Linda for such a long time is punished to the full extent possible. That means your nursing license is in peril as well. For you to sit by and watch those incompetent doctors and nurses continue hurting your sister when you are duty bound as her fiduciary to prevent that sort of thing is a liability you took on voluntarily, and for which you will pay dearly. The standard of conduct for you, as a nurse, is even higher than it would be for someone without training in the healing arts in a similar position. It will be my life's work from here on out to professionally destroy everyone who has had a part in this travesty, you included. Your refusal to even respond to my simple requests for information about my wife is intolerable and unforgivable. I have taken all I can of the isolation, bullying and intimidation you and the hospital have been dishing out. You will all pay, and pay dearly.

Now, even if Linda herself, who neither you or the hospital will even permit to call me on the phone, or me to call her, were to ask me to stop fighting this injustice, I would not stop. You and those around you at I U Hospital have had weeks and weeks to bully her into doing what you think she should be doing instead of what she wants done. I know, because that is what started all of this. She wanted to be let to die in peace, and you and the other right wing religious fanatics down there in the heart of the Bible Belt who kept telling me "Jesus doesn't want your wife to die" have done everything you can to browbeat her into continuing to suffer rather than letting her go peacefully as she made me promise long ago I would help her do when the time came and she chose hospice rather than all the torture you have put her through during the last several weeks. I heard you tell Linda and Pattie "I'm the witch in all this," and that is the last time I heard the truth pass your lips. I knew from the time Linda wanted to die at Northwestern and you didn't want to let her go that there would be a battle royal over this should the situation arise again, and it has and there is. You will have to kill me to get me to stop fighting you and everyone else on this.

I hope you are fully prepared. I am.